Would you like seconds?

Im not a very good cook. Im not bad, but I would never host a dinner party.
My area of specialty is casseroles. Anything that calls for a can of cream of mushroom or cream of chicken soup. My poor husband is a meat and potatoes sort of man. I have prepared countless rubber pot roasts, flavorless meatloaves and dehydrated chicken dishes trying to appease him. But sadly I always retreat back to my safe haven of casseroles and what he lovingly refers to as "slop dishes".
Slop would be anything without a formal title that is prepared in one skillet. ;)
So in an effort to end the moans and groans, I flipped through my Rachel Ray magazine and found a recipe that sounded good and had no "cream of...." listed in the ingredients. And it was a 30 minute meal! Score!! That meal was a great success and my husband came home from work and sat right down and devoured it with a smile on his face. (He doesn't smile when he eats the slop dishes, rather sits somewhat resigned with his shoulders slouched. Its quite pitiful.)
Feeling a renewed sense of hope for my culinary abilities I pressed on and looked for more delightful creations. I found a recipe on line for a cabbage stew that sounded pretty good. It had beer in it. Cant go wrong with beer, right?
Here's where things get tricky. If the ingredients aren't specific and leave room for interpretation my mind is automatically wired to make the worst possible choice. I don't do well on my own in the kitchen. I need Chefboyardee or Betty Crocker to hold my hand through each step of the process.
Recipe just says "beer". Doesn't say what brand. Doesn't even specify if it needs to be light or dark.
So I took what could have been a pretty tasty cabbage stew with potatoes, and added a bottle of Guinness and turned it into a pot of vile crud that not even Farmer John would toss to his pigs.
Damn. Strike one. I had Coco Puffs for dinner that night.
The very next day, I found a recipe for Slow Cooker Short Ribs. I carefully put in a whole slew of tasty spices and things and then breaded and browned the short ribs and set them on low to simmer all day.
Come dinner time, I open the crock pot and to my horror I see a huge pile of overly breaded and now slimy looking ribs that do not taste like ANY of the ingredients I put in there. So not only are they incredibly unattractive to look at and have the feel of waterlogged fried chicken, they also have no flavor to them. Wow. Strike two.
I had a glass of wine for dinner and another bowl of Coco Puffs.
My husband asked me this morning what tasty treats he can expect to come home to this evening. I said "Something with cream of chicken in it."
He sighed and went to work.