No Jacket Required.

That was one of the great albums of the 80's. I think I may even have it somewhere around here. But Im not here to talk about Phil Collins.
No, when I say No Jacket Required, Im referring to the unspoken ritual of male poops. For reasons that escape me, men seem to need to strip down in order to have a successful session in the doodie room. Maybe theres some underlying fear that the back of their shirts will somehow fall victim to a skid mark, or a corner will take an unintentional dip in the toilet water. Or perhaps they, in an effort to revert back to their caveman roots, strip down to get a more natural feel. Of course without having to go dig a hole and hover over it. Or whatever cavemen did.
(This might explain why my husband has on more than one occasion peed on a tree in our yard instead of walking the 30 feet back into the house to use the bathroom. But thats another story....)
Anyways, this behavior is more nature and not nurture as I have found out this afternoon.
I was rocking my 1 year old to sleep, when my 4 year old grabbed his butt, did a little dance and announced, "I have to go poop!" He hopped over the baby gate and disappeared down the hallway.
It was quiet for a couple of seconds, then I heard some whimpering, and frantic footsteps coming back down the hallway.
Im thinking "Great. He didnt make it to the toilet in time. More fragrant laundry for me. Cant get enough of that."
All of the sudden, he throws himself over the baby gate with the skill of a prison escapee and runs up to me, naked from the waist down, still doing his poopy dance and says "Mom! I cant get my jacket off!"
What? Are you serious??
Im trying to get his jacket off before something wicked this way comes, and the damn zipper is stuck. Wouldnt ya know??
I rip it off over his head and tell him to RUN!
RUN FORREST RUN!
And he dives back over the gate and is gone in a streak.
A brown streak. Just kidding. (couldnt help myself)
But seriously. Why the deep seeded need to poop in the nude?
Or maybe as Phil sings on track 4 of his album: "I dont wanna know."